"We keep pretty close track of what goes on up there," Mets pitcher Bobby Parnell said on Tuesday when MLB.com interrupted his December to see just what the 25-year-old reliever knew what he knew about Christmas, snow, reindeer and the rest.
The the ultra-thorough investigation now is complete. This is what we learned during our intense interrogation of Parnell.
MLB.com: How did you spend your Christmases as a kid?
Parnell: We'd get up kind of early and open presents and play. Nothing really out of the ordinary.
MLB.com: What is your favorite Christmas carol?
Parnell: "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."
MLB.com: I'm not sure that qualifies as a Christmas carol. It's a Christmas song.
Parnell: You're getting a little technical, 'ya know.
MLB.com: We strive for precision at MLB.com. So what's your favorite carol?
Parnell: I guess "Oh Come, All Ye Faithful." It's kind of catchy.
Parnell: Yes sir, catchy.
MLB.com: So I can assume your favorite song is "Rudolph?"
MLB.com: Catchy, too?
MLB.com: Do you know the lyrics?
Parnell: Yeah, even the "Like a lightbulb" part.
MLB.com: How many of the reindeer can you name?
Parnell: Oh lord. Uh ... Dasher ... Blitzen ... Rudolph, of course. He's the most wonderful reindeer of all.
MLB.com: What about Dancer?
Parnell: Yeah ... and Prancer.
MLB.com: And Comet?
Parnell: And Cupid. What am I up to? Six? How many are there?
MLB.com: I don't know, we just ask the questions. OK, the next one. Do you sleep on Christmas Eve?
Parnell: Of course, you need to get your rest for when you open your presents.
MLB.com: And when will that be at your house?
Parnell: I'll get up about nine. We don't want to rush it.
MLB.com: Where are you going to spend Christmas Eve?
Parnell: At home with my folks and my wonderful girlfriend, Megan. She helped me get my Christmas shopping done a long time ago.
MLB.com: And Christmas day?
Parnell: We'll be all over -- home, at my grandparents. Lots of family. In the course of the day, there'll be at least 30 people.
MLB.com: Now, Bobby, this is important. Do you leave a snack for Santa?
Parnell: I haven't in recent years.
MLB.com: Did you ever?
Parnell: Of course, we'd leave him some cookies.
MLB.com: And were there crumbs gone the next morning?
Parnell: Yeah, and the dishes were washed. I never understood that.
MLB.com: So, have you been good this year?
Parnell: Pretty much.
MLB.com: So what do you think you're going to get from Santa?
Parnell: I have no idea. I didn't ask for anything.
MLB.com: Why not?
Parnell: I don't want anyone spending a lot on me.
MLB.com: Well, put aside expense. What would you like to get?
Parnell: A World Series ring. But I'll take it in October. I want a real one.
MLB.com: What would you buy and for whom would you buy it for if you could buy anything for anyone?
Parnell: Whatever my folks wanted.
MLB.com: And what would you say to the world if you had an open mike?
Parnell: Merry Christmas.
MLB.com: Thanks, Bobby. And Merry Christmas to you and all the folks in Salisbury.
Marty Noble is a reporter for MLB.com. This story was not subject to the approval of Major League Baseball or its clubs.